Thriving Together: Why Parent and Child Mental Health Matters
In today's fast-paced world, it's easy to overlook one of the most crucial aspects of our well-being: mental health. For families, this is particularly important, as the mental health of parents and children are deeply interconnected. Let’s explore why supporting mental health is vital and how families can nurture it together.
Parents and Kids Are Not Okay
Many parents and children are currently struggling. Recent data shows that in 2020, 9.2% of children under 18 were diagnosed with anxiety, and 4% with depression—representing a 24-27% increase since 2016. (1) Meanwhile, 41% of parents report feeling too stressed to function, and 48% feel completely overwhelmed. (2) These statistics aren't meant to alarm, blame, or create added pressure on you. They acknowledge that there is a collective struggle, and you are not alone. It’s important to recognize the broader systems impacting parental stress and children's health—such as the growing financial burdens of childcare, housing, healthcare, school safety, and the effects of technology/social media on youth. These factors play a significant role in overall mental health, and they are influenced by larger systems that we can’t simply “self-care” our way out of.
Acknowledging the challenges posed by these systems is important when considering the increasing parental stress and childhood mental health. It’s vital to also focus on what we can control on a more individualized level. Small, intentional changes in our daily lives can have a meaningful effect on our family’s mental health. Ultimately, it’s about recognizing that while external factors play a role, our actions and interactions at home are vital for nurturing resilience and support for ourselves and our kids.
Signs of Mental Health Struggles
It's helpful to be aware of signs that someone might be struggling with their mental health. For both children and adults, key indicators include but are not limited to:
● Changes in daily functioning and performance
● Excessive worry or distress
● Avoidance of activities or social interactions
● Difficulty concentrating or making decisions
● Changes in sleep or appetite
Remember, experiencing these occasionally is normal. It's when they become persistent and disruptive to daily life that they might signal a need for additional support.
The Parent-Child Mental Health Connection
Families are like ecosystems, where everyone’s well-being affects one another. While this connection goes both ways, parents play a particularly crucial role in how children develop, connect with others, and cope with stressors as adults. Research on Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) shows that when parents struggle with significant mental health issues and parental stress, it can make it harder for children to thrive.(3) Though this responsibility can feel overwhelming, it's also empowering to know that you have many practical, daily ways to positively impact your child's well-being.
Parenting is incredibly demanding, and it's normal to struggle in different seasons of raising kids. When parents are under chronic stress or dealing with mental health challenges, it can affect the whole family. This isn't about placing blame—it’s about recognizing the importance of seeking support when you need it. If you're feeling overwhelmed, remember seeking help is a sign of strength. This could mean talking to a friend, joining a support group, or seeking professional help. By taking care of yourself, you're also taking care of your family.
Supporting Children's Mental Health
Understanding child development is key in supporting your child's mental health. Often, parental frustrations arise when we expect more from children their developing brains can handle.
Here are some ways to support your child's mental health:
1. Meet them where they are: Tailor your support, expectations, and boundaries to their age and developmental stage.
2. Validate and be a nonjudgmental space for emotions: Let them know it's okay to feel disappointed, frustrated, or confused.
3. Be present: Sometimes, just listening and being there is the most powerful support you can offer.
4. Encourage resilience: Help them face discomfort rather than avoid them.
5. Problem solve together: To know they aren’t alone in solving the problem “we can figure it out together!”
6. Seek additional support when needed: If you're concerned about your child's mental health, don't hesitate to reach out to professionals.
Promoting Mental Health in Families
Now for the empowering part: there’s so much we can do to support mental health in our families! Here are some concrete ideas:
1. Create a Supportive Environment: Small changes can make a big difference. Reflect on your daily routines and home environment. Is there an area that adds stress for you or your child? Don’t underestimate how one tiny adjustment can have a significant impact. Eliminating daily frustrations- only one spot for your keys- or incorporating little sources of joy—a family picture, a favorite activity—can help shift the stress in your home.
2. Encourage Open Communication: Make it a norm to discuss feelings in your family. Use tools like emotion wheels or read books that explore social-emotional concepts together. Choose a time to check in about each other's day—whether it’s right before bed, during dinner, or while you unwind on the couch. Even short moments of connection can be meaningful.
3. Establish Helpful Routines and Rhythms: Don’t underestimate the impact of routines on mental health. Regular sleep schedules, consistent meal and snack times, and incorporating movement can greatly enhance mood and cooperation within the family.
4. Model Self-Care and Emotional Regulation: Remember, kids learn by observing us. Demonstrate self-care by admitting when you’ve made a mistake or reacted in a way you’re not proud of. Show how to make it right. Set boundaries and take breaks when needed, avoiding overscheduling.
5. Get Outside: Nature has a remarkable ability to reduce stress and anxiety. Simple actions like stepping outside for fresh air, having a snack together in the garden, playing a game outdoors, or taking a short walk can uplift everyone’s spirits.
6. Embrace a Growth Mindset: Teach your kids that making mistakes is part of learning and growth. Encourage them to see challenges as opportunities for improvement, fostering resilience and adaptability.
By integrating these practices into your family life, you create a nurturing environment that supports everyone’s mental health and well-being.
Take It One Step at a Time
Remember, prioritizing mental health in your family isn't about being perfect. It's about creating a system where everyone feels supported, understood, and able to face life's challenges. Every small step you take towards better mental health – for yourself and your children – is a victory worth celebrating. By focusing on mental health, you're giving your family one of the greatest gifts possible: the tools to navigate life's ups and downs with resilience. You're not just helping your family today; you're setting the stage for healthier, more content generations to come.
1. Lebrun-Harris LA, Ghandour RM, Kogan MD, Warren MD. Five-Year Trends in US
Children’s Health and Well-being, 2016-2020. JAMA Pediatr. 2022;176(7):e220056.
doi:10.1001/jamapediatrics.2022.0056
2. Murthy, V. (2024, August 28). Parents Under Pressure: The U.S. Surgeon General's
Advisory on the Mental Health & Well-Being of Parents. United States. Public
Health Service. Office of the Surgeon General.
https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/parents-under-pressure.pdf
3. Crouch, E., Radcliff, E., Brown, M., & Hung, P. (2019). Exploring the association
between parenting stress and a child’s exposure to adverse childhood
experiences (ACEs). Children and Youth Services Review, 102, 186.
https://doi.org/10.1016/j.childyouth.2019.05.019
Dee Keller, Licensed Professional Counselor | Owner of Sunnyside Counseling
sunnysidecville.com